vomitting for fun & stature

Well everyone... after my performance... read in to this the lack of... while competing in the Aucland Marathon it maybe time to reconsider my devotion to the sport of self flagerlation by way of moving the feet often over long distance... this being the morning after however the pain is rapidly fading into the realm of the warm glow of accomplishment... for those of you that know Auckland the run takes from Devonport across the Harbour bridge.. this being the main reason for attempting the run... then through the central business district out around the bays to the turn around point back along the bays and through the business district to the finish... things were looking bad for me at the 28 k mark.. and by the 35 k mark I was had it and had come to the conclusion that I was not going to finish... by this time I had had three sit downs and was on my third and what I thought was my last total lay down head on hands totaly sprawled out on the grass.... sort of moaning and feeling sorry for myself... a combination of exhaustion, heatstroke and really just feeling sick had put an end to me.. my last grass flop was at about the 39 k mark which is really dpressing because it's only 3 k to the finish... however I was rescued by the ambulance people and after vomiting up all the water I had drunk during the run... I started to feel alot better and off I went again ... in fact I ran the last two K's to the finish... this was a hell of a suprise to me considering how sick I was before that I could not even stand up let alone walk... I think I was about third to last.. but the welcome you get as you stumble across the finish is amazing most distance runners understand what you go through and how hard you have to fight sometimes to make the finish...

just as an amusement for you... I'm running a virus scan using avg and microsoft spyware.. I regret to inform you that my comp has HIV bordering on full blown AIDs... something called Adware Generic BVB.. it does not sound too bad... but it seems to be in everything... When you have read this email I suggest you burn your computer...

best wishes to you all... uppie

the "headgirl" controversary

I just had to rush to the comp and let you guys know.... well I was examining my ass in the mirror... as you do... [ No, Only Fiend does that...] this is not something males do often... but it is a fact of human nature that all females are cognisant of... anyway I was not really examining my butt I was looking at my tan... as you know I sunbathe nekkid.. did you know you get two white triangles of flesh right where the tops of your thighs meet the cheeks of your ass... I had never noticed that before.. the other thing that has happened and I know you guys are rolling your eyes.. it's very boring for people to waa on about their own children... not nearly as interesting as my ongoing battle with the legion of sluggs sliding round my kitchen... however my other daughter.. not the prospective headgirl. [There's just something wrong about that phrase... ]. the sporty one [Does that mean Dike? ] has been selected for the National Youth Developement Squad for netball... the upshot of this being it puts her in the top 50 or so girls in the country in this sport... but the aim for these girls is to be selected to represent New Zealand at the world youth champs in 2009... it's a long way from that but it is the beginning... now ain't that a whole lot more interesting than snail trails round the kitchen... lastly I'm running in the Auckland Marathon this weekend so on sunday... thats saturday for you canadians... think of me and my sweatyness.... [I'd rather NOT picture you sweaty, thanks anyway... ]

Cheers Uppie Your chat god

Uppie talking about snail trails...LOL...perfect!!

Hmmm ... now what was I going to tell you all.. oh yes ... an update on the slug invasion.. as I have already told you... thats if you read my entertaining and enlightening dirge's .. I don't even know if thats a word or if it applies to this medium but I feel like a bit of a dirge... ok ok I hear you say.. back to the sluggs... as you know at first I thought it was one slugg crawling around and living on the crumbs on the kitchen floor... with four teenagers these crumbs are really a feast... and I must say a slugg can cover an aweful lot of ground overnight.. judging by the snail trails left in the morning... and although silvery and extensive they are very easy to clean up with no unpleasant odour or residue... well I thought it was one which I duely caught and threw outside... but the morning trails continued.. I have subsequently caught and thrown outside two more sluggs... of good size and obviously well fed... you'll note that I'm too soft to execute them... but this morning still more trail snails... oh by the way to effect capture means to get up in the wee hours to catch them when they are foraging.. and I have not the heart to use the snail poison on them.. but I'm starting to think that it is only one slugg and the bastard is sneaking back inside...

I remain Uppie The Faithless God To All Chat Ho's

do the hippy hippy shake

I just got back from my trip to Wellington last night... I attended the CTU conference as a delegate for the Dairy Workers Union... for those of you that do not live in New Zealand... and that is most of you... the CTU is the Union organisation that the Unions affiliate too to promote our political and national agendas... we have just elected a Labour Government in this country thats left wing to you Americans... so we went to a reception at parliment and hobb nobbed with the Prime Minister and her cronies... a group of us got invited down to the inner offices to party on... I got reasonably sloshed and spent the next day regreting it... the best thing I spose was eating out and not paying for it... the delegates to the conference ... numbering about 200... are a bunch of large ego union secretaries... organisers..
and political junkies which made for some interesting discussions... the organisation is also a magnet for lesbians queers and other assorted riff raff with adgendas to push.(imagine a whole bunch of Fiends all showing off their ass's) uppie just fitted right in there.. Wellington as a city is one that I really like because there are so many weird people there... think of Fiend again and a bunch of Jerks... we went out for dinner at this great resteurant called The Matterhorn.. the food was very good and the service professional... but all the staff were shaved head ..body pierced... tattoed faggots in army uniforms... all very pretty boys...I almost and I stress almost realised why faggots are gay... as usual I gambled as much and as often as I could and came home with an extra 60 dollars in my pocket... before& I came home this lady that I was traveling with and I
went and visited Te Papa which is our national museum... the day before they had had some peace protesters down there causing trouble... this woman I was with is a dreadlocked hippy type... sort of cool but straight people only see what they see... anyway there were three security gaurds at the door... well as we breezed in they sort of closed in on us... I did not realise what was going on and made the usual smart Uppie remarks... to the tune of ... " do you want to search our bags".. then we just carried on walking... It was not till later that I realised that they were serious... but that they did not have to nerve to pull us up...Dam in New Zealand we just do not put up with that security crap.. it's just such a safe country we live in... it never occured to me that we were on the verge of being arrested...
I hope it never comes to the point in this country where just because someone has dreadlocks and dress's sort of weird like that people automaticaly assumes you are dangerous...

Cheers Uppie your chat god (retired)

please excuse the spelling as my crappy spell check did not work

another day in the boring life of the southern Upsidedownia resident

Everytime I logg on lately I intend to send you all out an Uppie date ... but then I get distracted... usualy by someone female.... and well... you know how it goes... so today I'm going to try and let you know whats up in the world of Uppie... those of you with a modicum of attention span not devoted to your own navel or internet porn ... (fiend and guru) would know that it's almost summer here in New Zealand and this means it's swim season... as a referee it means a busy time for me... I spent all day at a swim meet today... the hightlight being that my daughter won the Skins race which is where they race over 25 meters again and again untill there are only two swimmers left (the losers keep dropping out) it's a feat of endurance and speed.... then the winner takes all the prize being $200.. she was most pleased with this and the two daughters have gone out to 10 pin bowling for the night... she did shout me a coco cola drink...hmmmm. I had a meeting yesterday where I was in the running for a trip to South America... specificaly seven days in Buenos Aries.. if that is spelt right.. I missed out on this but I was given a three day trip to a conference in Wellington instead not as adventurous as South America but very interesting for me personaly... a week or two ago my wifes brother had a heart attack which meant the four sisters got together at our place then we ferried them up to Auckland along with the mother to visit him on his deathbed.. (so to speak)... he was in a pretty bad way and had had an operation to open up his arteries.. but the sisters being what they are sat around his bed cackling and laughing (along with a few tears) and making jokes and snide remarks at his expense... it reminded me of the Bootery in full flight.. he is going to be ok and is alot better as I type this... ok thats enough crap... I miss you all alot and it would be nice to know which of you have me blocked and deleted... or are you really getting mail from me after all these years and reading it... are you stupid.....
Cheers for now Uppie